While “affordable luxury” reads like an oxymoron, “swanky” is more attitude than acquisition, says Susan Zelouf …
Shhhh. Quiet Luxury is resting, wrapped in Loro Piana Cocooning Collection cashmere, arms toned, nails buffed, no make-up make-up (dewy and hydrated, plumped and deep-planed), in a private plane en route to a private bank where she stashes her stealth wealth. Her bestie Swanky, along for the ride, drains her Aperol Spritz and toys with the paper straw. Shaking her toasted coconut balayage at her abstemious, expensively groomed, understated pal, out pops a sparkling thought bubble: “Luxe has loadsa dosh, for sure, but where’s the fun in that?”
The really rich are not like us. The monied, all but invisible but to each other, live, travel and acquire off-piste. How the wealthy spend it is akin to a secret handshake; when you know, you know. Tagged in 148 million Instagram posts, what is #luxury anyway, and why is it omnipresent on nearly every Life Coach client’s vision board? And what makes Swanky, Luxury’s black sheep “sister from another mister” so much more fun?
The definition of luxury has evolved from an indulgent pleasure enjoyed by the privileged few to include a more modern sensibility – new luxury is not just the acquisition of an object of desire for its own sake, but experience-based and preferably inaccessible to plebs, adhering to rigorous ethical and environmentally conscious standards. Sustainable superyacht, anyone?
While “affordable luxury” reads like an oxymoron, “swanky” is more attitude than acquisition. Even saying the word evokes a heightened sense of drama; maybe it’s the physicality of wrapping your lips around the first two sounds, s-w, challenging to master, according to speech pathologist Sarah Lobegeiger de Rodriguez’s English Pronunciation Tips YouTube video. Pucker up and say it with me: Swanky. Swagger. Swag. Swell!
“In his blue gardens men and girls came and went like moths among the whispering and the champagne and the stars.” The Great Gatsby
So, do you need to be flaithiúlach to afford the good life? Rule of thumb: if paying for it makes you anxious, it’s a luxury you can’t afford. Recently, I found myself in London’s Sexy Fish, a vibey sushi restaurant in upscale Mayfair, squinting at the tiny big prices on the extravagant menu. Determined to throw myself in at the deep end, I began with a £21 Luxurious cocktail and gawped as one of the ridiculously good-looking mixologists composed my drink. Haku vodka, tonka, passionfruit, ginger, acquavit, soda and champagne foam tasted, well, very expensive. But puttin’ on the ritz needn’t be a pricey affair. Look @mrstreetpeeper Phil Oh for Vogue’s Best Street Style Photos, for tips on how to nail it and look swank on the cheap. Better yet, pick up New York Times bestseller Bill Cunningham: On the Street, “a dazzling kaleidoscope from the gaze of an artist who saw beauty at every turn”, according to the late André Leon Talley, a fashion legend himself, who knew the difference between swank and luxe.
Compare the joyful play of swanky inventiveness snapped outside Fashion Week catwalks worldwide (more swagger and sway, less fashionable elegance, and crucially, full of life) as opposed to what reads as misery emanating from many a nepo baby warming coveted front row seats; binge-watch Succession and see if you can identify the labels behind the no labels worn by Logan Roy’s malignant scions, further proof that money can’t buy you luxe. Correction: money can buy you luxe, but where’s the fun in that? @susanzelouf
1. I’M FLAUNTING it in The Attico AW23 RTW, inspired by fabulously eccentric Milanese-born Marchesa Luisa Casati.
2. I’M WINGING it with Wingen barware by Lalique. Collect piece by swanky piece from Cashs of Ireland.
3. I’M PURRING in Celine Eyewear cateye sunglasses. Miaow!
4. I’M GIFTING beautiful & damned Gatsby cufflinks; to order from Newleaf’s Etsy shop.
5. I’M SUITING up in Ermanno Scervino Resort 2024.
6. I’M NAILING it in Mistletoe Lakur by Londontown from www.makeup.ie.
7. I’M SWANKING around in a lyrical Bow bag in navy satin by www.augustnight.ie. In scarlet, black, blush and rose velvet too.
8. I’M KINDA blue, inspired by a 2024 nail trend spotted on Ahluwalia’s catwalk.
9. I’M SIPPING absinthe with wormwood from the Celtic Whiskey Shop.
10. I’M BEWITCHING nearby noses in Vyrao Witchy Woo. www.cultbeauty.com.
11. I’M MAKING eye contact in Dark Opulence, a Tom Ford Runaway Palette, at Brown Thomas.
12. I’M PAYING homage to Naomi at the upcoming V&A exhibition dedicated to swank icon Naomi Campbell.
13. I’M BROOCHING the subject of gifts; top of list is Stephen Webster’s heady Flight Encounter in titanium, white gold and blackened silver, encrusted with gems. From the limited edition Sworn Enemies collection at www.stephenwebster.com.
14. I’M STASHING my valuables in Prada’s Saffiano leather minaudière belt. www.modesens.com.
15. I’M TRIPPING the light sling-tastic in Saint Laurent Blade 90 velvet slingback pumps. www.matchesfashion.com.