4 weeks ago

Finding You – Becoming Your Biggest, Brightest, Best Self


Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement. – Golda Meir

Stop for just a second. Pause. What is going through your mind, underneath the layer that was starting to read this article? We are very rarely fully present and in ‘the moment’. We have other stuff going on. We are thinking about what we need to do when we finish reading this article, worried about the kids, how that meeting will go, our sick parent, the impact of Covid-19, all the things we need to do…


For just a moment focus on your breath. Breathe in for a count of four and out for a count of six, four times. Focussing on your breath, bring yourself out of your head, out of your thoughts and into your body. Squeeze your shoulder blades together, feel the release. Be IN your body. Notice what’s happening as you breathe. Now you are here with me. Now we can do the work.

In this calm moment I’d like you to remember a happy time; when you were ecstatic, or bursting with pride, filled with love, feeling AMAZING, feeling successful, on top of the world, on top of your game. Close your eyes and remember that moment. See it in your mind’s eye, replay the movie. Who is there with you? What are they saying? What colours do you see? What do you hear? Make the picture clearer, brighter, louder. Take a deep breath in. Be in your body as you were in that memory, your stance, your head, your mouth, your eyes, your jaw. Connect into your body and live in your body as you did in that joyous moment. Feel the energy that fills your body, feel the power. You are standing taller or sitting straighter, aren’t you? Hold that pose. Hold that thought. Hold that energy. You can relive this feeling anytime you want. You can recapture your best moments and relive them, anytime, as if it were now.

You have the power within you to feel any way you want, anytime you want. Your brain does not know that it is not now. Your brain does what you tell it to do. Tell it something wonderful. A combination of the thoughts we think and the things we do with our bodies create who we are in any moment.

Ask yourself: “who do I want to be in this moment?” Do I want to be an anxious, worried person who does not believe in herself? Do I want to be stressed, angry, frustrated?”

“How is it serving me to think these stressful, negative thoughts?”

“How do I sit and stand when I am calm, collected, happy, confident, loving? How is my being when I feel those positive emotions? How does it serve me to feel happy, loving, generous, empathetic, sympathetic, understanding, patient, kind, thoughtful?”

Go to those thoughts, capture them in your mind. Go to those emotions, embrace them with your whole body. How good do you feel?

Dr Amy Cuddy did a great Ted Talk back in 2012 ‘Your body may shape who you are’ in which she explains a little about the body-brain connection. Watch it if you haven’t already, watch it again if you have, remind yourself. In somatic coaching we coach the whole person, the SOMA – body mind spirit. We use the neuroscience to access the mind to connect to the body and the spirit. We are energy. We pass energy to and from each other. What is the energy that you are carrying in yourself right now, is it a good, positive energy or is a negative, stressful, depressed, draining energy? The energy you carry impacts not only you but those around you. Like a virus it spreads. What are you spreading? Joy or anger?

I invite you to get out of your own way and step into your greatness and here are some tips on how to get there:

  1. Believe in yourself. Understand that whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you are right.
  2. Surround yourself with positive people. We all know complainers that suck the life out of you with how miserable everything is, they steal your time and your energy. Find people whose energy gives you energy, who want to rise to a challenge and make the most of things.
  3. Live in the now. Depression comes from looking back, regretting, thinking what if. Anxiety comes from looking to the future and worrying about all the bad things that might happen that you have zero control over.
  4. Choose, in every minute of every day who you want to be, choose your energy, choose your response to the energy of others. Choose how happy, generous, kind-hearted, loving, patient, focussed, confident you want to be and BE IT.
  5. Be grateful. For everything and everyone in your life, for who you are and for who you have been up to this point in your life, you are here now because of every choice you made. You are this amazing unique individual because of everything you have done.
  6. Get out of your head and into your body. Stop overthinking and act, make mistakes, that’s how we learn, (your perfectionism is screaming right now). And watch out for the ‘knowing-doing GAP’. We all know what we need to do, but how many of us do it?
  7. Think of others. Ask yourself every day; “Who can I help today?”
  8. Be kind. First to yourself and then to others.
  9. Play, sing, dance, love, laugh. Spread joy everywhere you go.

It has been a pleasure to offer you my thoughts over these last six weeks. Thank you.

“The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is mere tenacity” – Amelia Earhart


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